How Managers Can Become Better Leaders by Applying Holistic Leadership
The value of empathy on teams
👋 Hey, Carlos here! Welcome to “The Holistic Leader”, your weekly source of simple and honest leadership, Agile, Management & team insights.
Being a manager is not always easy.
Being a manager means that you’re responsible for people who might come from completely different backgrounds, speak in different ways, and have unique work styles.
Some are driven by ambition, while others just want stability.
And as their manager, you’re expected to guide them all toward success.
For me, being a manager it’s not just about managing tasks or hitting goals.
👉 It’s about understanding people.
When I started as a Project Manager, my path wasn’t conventional. I jumped straight into a managerial role without any prior experience.
I didn’t climb the ladder step by step (I was thrown into the deep end)
And let me tell you, it was hard.
It wasn’t the workload or the deadlines that challenged me the most.
It was the people:
My direct reports, who had different needs and expectations.
My teams, who struggled to align.
And even my manager, a Director with high standards and little time for coaching.
At first, I felt overwhelmed. I didn’t have a guidebook or years of experience to fall back on.
But in that struggle, I learned some of the most important lessons about leadership
👉 Lessons that shaped my approach today.
The Shift from Managing to Leading
Over time, I realized the problem wasn’t about managing tasks; it was about connecting with people. That’s when I discovered the principles of Holistic Leadership, which changed everything.
But before that, let me be honest.
I was drowning in work.
I wanted to do great things for my team, and I even tried helping other project managers by changing how they managed theirs.
But I didn’t have the tools or knowledge I needed.
I knew nothing about team dynamics, conflict resolution, stakeholder management, or how to motivate and lead by example. I was just a person trying to manage without any authority, relying on common sense and doing things "by the book" the best I could.
Until one day, a big deadline for an important project came.
We weren’t fast enough to deliver.
We lacked the tools to get the job done.
We ran out of people to complete the tasks.
We didn’t have the knowledge to move forward.
And worst of all, the client’s requirements weren’t clear enough for the team to understand the bigger picture.
And guess what? I was in charge.
At that moment, I realized the weight of leadership. It wasn’t my team’s problem
It was mine. and as a project leader, I was supposed to already have the skills to:
Approach tight deadlines with confidence.
Negotiate with stakeholders for clarity and support.
Step out of my comfort zone and ask for help.
Be the kind of leader others admire and not just for my words, but for my actions.
What happened next?
I was told to inform my team that they would need to work extra hours, including weekends, to complete the project.
But instead of simply giving the order and leaving them to it, I chose to stay with them. Even though I wasn’t programming or directly contributing, I stayed to support them.
We worked through the night—3:00 am, 4:00 am, 6:00 am—knowing we had to deliver the features by 9:00 am as per the contract.
What happened that night was incredible:
It was chaotic but collaborative.
We were distracted but deeply engaged.
The team was tired but full of camaraderie.
Everyone was exhausted yet fully supportive of one another.
We were working in what I would later come to understand as a truly Agile environment without even knowing Scrum existed.
The Day After
The day after the big deadline, we were all exhausted but proud of what we had accomplished.
We had pulled off a major win, and the team felt like we had conquered a mountain together.
For me, it wasn’t just about delivering the project on time. It was about what happened after. I was no longer just “the new PM.” I became someone who was willing to stand by my team when it mattered.
Later that day, something unexpected happened. One of our shyest developers, who barely spoke during meetings, came up to me.
“Hey Carlos, thanks for staying and supporting us yesterday,” he said. Then came the words that changed how I approached leadership forever:
“We couldn’t have done it without you. Thanks for staying.”
Those words hit me hard. Not because I thought I had done anything extraordinary, but because I realized what my presence meant to the team. That moment changed our dynamic completely.
Suddenly, the team started inviting me for lunch, chatting with me during breaks, and even joking around during our daily meetings.
The atmosphere was lighter, and collaboration flowed naturally.
This shift wasn’t about me being a perfect manager or knowing all the answers.
👉 It was about earning their trust.
The Power of ❤️ Empathy in Leadership
Looking back, that was the first time I truly lived one of the core values of Holistic Leadership:
👉 Empathy: Supporting your team with care MATTERS.
As a leader, it’s easy to have high expectations for your team and expect them to always perform at their best.
But here’s the truth: your team is always watching you.
— They’re watching how you behave in tough situations.
— They’re watching if you’re willing to step into the chaos with them.
— They’re watching to see if you’re ready to lead by example.
And that’s when they decide if they’ll follow you.
not because you’re “nice,” but because you’ve shown them, through your actions, that you’re willing to lead with them, not above them.
How Holistic Leadership Can Help You Lead Better
After that big project, I learned a lot about leadership. One lesson stood out: being a leader isn’t about telling people what to do.
That’s where Holistic Leadership comes in.
It’s built on 5 simple values and 5 guiding principles that help you lead in a way that makes sense for your team and builds real connections.
The 5 Core Values of Holistic Leadership
❤️ Empathy: Care about your team.
Take the time to understand what your team needs. Listening and supporting them makes a big difference.
🌍 Inclusivity: Make space for everyone.
Different voices and ideas make your team stronger. Make sure everyone feels heard and valued.
♻️ Sustainability: Think long-term.
Focus on creating systems and habits that will keep your team strong—not just quick fixes.
📚 Growth: Help your team improve.
As a leader, part of your job is helping your team learn and get better at what they do.
💪Well-Being: Take care of your people.
Happy, healthy teams do their best work. Check in with your team and make sure they’re doing okay.
The 5 Principles of Holistic Leadership
🔑 Be Authentic: Be yourself.
Your team will trust you more when they see you’re real and honest.
⚖️ Act Ethically: Do what’s right.
Lead with integrity. Your actions set the tone for the team.
⚡ Be Agile: Stay flexible.
Things change all the time. Be ready to adapt and help your team do the same.
🤝 Be Collaborative: Work together.
Leadership isn’t about being in charge. It’s about working with your team to solve problems and find solutions.
👁️ Be Visionary: Focus on the big picture.
Help your team see how their work matters and how it fits into a bigger goal.
Remember:
Leadership isn’t about forcing people to follow you.
It’s about earning their trust, one moment, one decision, one action at a time.
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Thanks for reading
See you next week!
- Carlos✌️
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