Leading When You’re Not “One of Them”
How a global project and a room full of PMs pushed me toward Holistic Leadership
Today’s Overview
Part 1: Why Holistic Leadership Matters
Why most leadership styles don’t go far enough
The real story that led me to build this approach
What Holistic Leadership is (and isn’t)
Part 2: The Core of Holistic Leadership
The 5 Essential Values that guide intent
The 5 Core Principles that guide action
How they connect - and why both matter
Most leadership experts will tell you there are about 6 to 12 core leadership styles.
Some go further and list 20 or even 25, combining classic, modern, and emerging models.
But here’s the thing:
Nobody is talking about Holistic Leadership.
Not one of those styles fully speaks to the kind of leader I’ve coached…
…the kind of leader who leads with empathy and accountability.
…the kind who cares about results, but not at the cost of people.
…the kind who doesn’t fit neatly into one “style.”
That’s why I created this.
Holistic Leadership isn’t just another style, it’s a mindset.
It’s for leaders who want to grow the business and protect their team’s well-being.
It’s for people who want to lead without losing themselves.
If that’s you, you’re in the right place.
Ready? Let’s dive in. 🚀
I while back ago I joined a company, I was the new hire. I came in through the PMO, but my job wasn’t just to support one project, it was to help multiple teams rethink how they worked.
I wasn’t there to take over, I was there to help, to bring in new ways of working, and to introduce more agility, not just in process, but in mindset.
On paper, I was in a leadership position, but in reality, I was coaching teams, guiding delivery, running retros, supporting leadership, and trying to shift how people thought about work and collaboration.
From the outside, you see things people inside the system can’t. That’s part of the value, the organization brings you in to spot patterns, blockers, blind spots. You’re not there to fix everything, you’re there to tell the truth.
But truth is uncomfortable, and it wasn’t always welcome.
Some teams were open, some managers were curious, but many were skeptical. You’d hear the usual phrases:
“That’s not going to work here.”
“We’ve already tried that.”
“This is how we’ve always done it.”
“Why do we need to change?”
The dynamic was weird, sometimes tense. You’d see unfair treatment in meetings, people being shut down, others holding back, control being used as a leadership tactic. It was all there.
And it wasn’t just at the team level. When I spoke to some senior leaders, the ones sponsoring these initiatives, the response was mixed. Some were clearly closed off, but a few were paying attention. They saw something working in the teams that were willing to try, and they started asking questions.
Not everyone was ready to lead differently, but some were, and they were the ones who made the biggest difference.
That contrast made me stop and ask myself,
👉 What kind of leadership are we rewarding?
👉 What kind of leadership do we actually need?
Because what I was seeing didn’t match what I believe leadership should be.
Leadership isn’t control, it’s not silence, it’s not pressure for the sake of progress.
It’s care, clarity, direction, accountability, consistency,
It’s how you show up when people are watching, and when they’re not.
That experience pushed me to write things down, not just what wasn’t working, but what actually helped, what teams responded to, what made the work better, the conversations more real, and the leadership more human.
That’s how Holistic Leadership started.
In today’s article, I’ll walk you through what Holistic Leadership is, and break down the 10 elements that define it.
What Is Holistic Leadership?
Holistic Leadership is not a method or a management trend.
It’s a mindset.
It focuses on how we show up, how we make decisions, how we relate to others, and how we care for both the work and the people doing it.
Holistic Leadership balances two things:
Results - delivering value, making progress, staying accountable
People - creating safety, trust, connection, and growth
Most leadership styles pick one or the other. Holistic Leadership does both
It’s built around 10 elements - drawn from real experience leading teams, working inside organizations, and seeing where leadership breaks down.
The Foundation:
5 Core Principles and 5 Essential Values
These are the building blocks of Holistic Leadership.
Every framework, tool, and decision starts here.
The 5 Essential Values (your inner compass):
Authenticity - You lead from truth, not image
Collaboration - You create with others, not above them
Ethical Decision-Making - You choose what’s right, not just what’s easy
Visionary Thinking - You stay connected to the bigger picture
Agility - You stay grounded, adaptable, and open to change
These five values aren’t about being a “good” leader. They’re about being a real one.
They keep you steady when things go sideways.
They remind you to do what’s right, not what’s convenient.
But values alone aren’t enough.
You need clear principles to guide what you actually do - how you lead, how you decide, how you work with others.
If the values are your inner compass, the principles are how you put them into practice.
Let’s break down the 5 Core Principles of Holistic Leadership.
The 5 Core Principles (your daily practices):
Empathy - You lead with presence and care
Inclusivity - You create space for every voice
Sustainability - You protect energy, people, and the long-term
Personal Development - You grow and help others grow
Well-being - You protect people’s mental and physical health
Values shape what you stand for.
Principles shape how you lead.
You need both - especially when things get hard.
Values keep you honest.
Principles keep you consistent.
Without values, leadership feels fake.
Without principles, it feels random.
Holistic Leadership is about alignment - between what you believe, how you act, and how others experience you.
That’s the difference between leading on paper, and leading for real.
Final Thoughts
Most leadership advice sounds good on paper.
But real teams don’t run on paper.
They run on trust, tension, messy conversations, and the people who show up every day trying to make it work.
Holistic Leadership came from that reality - not from theory, not from trends.
From sitting with teams, seeing what breaks, and learning what actually helps.
It’s not a fix-all.
It’s just a better way to lead - with more clarity, more care, and less pretending.
And if you’ve ever felt like you don’t fit into the usual leadership molds,
you’re probably doing more right than you think.
This is just the beginning.
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Thanks for reading.
See you next week!
- Carlos
✉️ Got a leadership situation you’re stuck on?
Send it here - I might include it in a future piece.
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